Thursday, March 3, 2011

Time for Me Thursday



It's Thursday and you know what that means! It's time for me! Wow, that sounded egotistical, didn't it? Maybe I should have said it's time for us to do something good for us! Does that sound nicer? If not, well shoot, y'all know what I mean. It's time for all of us to do something nice for ourselves. We need to take care of ourselves because if we don't, we're no good for anyone else.

Today, I'm doing something a little bit different. I'm giving myself a reality check. As some of you may have read over at Welcoming Weight Loss, I've joined this fantastic group called the Mamavation Sistahood. They are some of the most incredible, generous and loving women you will ever meet.

Now, what you may not know is that a few times a year, they select women to become Mamavation Mamas. This is a huge thing! These ladies take trying to lose weight to a whole new level. A few people were encouraging me to apply but honestly, I'm just not ready for that. I was really worried that I was disappointing people by saying no or that maybe they thought I was making excuses. The truth is I'm not ready. This morning, one of their most fabulous mama's, Shelley and I were talking and she said what I'd been saying. She said yeah, you're not ready. This brought some serious mixed feelings. On one hand, I was almost relieved that someone else saw what I was saying. On the other hand it was a big time reality check. Let me explain why.

For a very long time, I had the worse self esteem a woman could have. In fact, I called it negative self esteem because everything I thought about myself was negative. For the past few years, I've been working hard at getting past that. One of the ways I was doing that was by telling myself that I was ok just the way I am. Now, that didn't just mean personality, it meant physically. This morning, suddenly the reality was right in front of my face. I'm not ok just how I am. I'm not. I am a beautiful person but what I have done to my body is not beautiful. It's dangerous. It's scary and it needs to change.

So, what am I doing for me today? I'm exploring this reality check. I'm working on some "assignments" to help me explore how I got to nearly 300 pounds. I'm going to write in my paper journal. Then, I'm going to spend a fun afternoon/evening with my boys. It's Family Reading Night at their school and we're going to go and have a fantastic time!

What are you going to do for you today? Are you going to find time to journal? Paint your nails a delicious new color? Curl up with a favorite movie? Spend some time moving that body to get your sweat on? Make sure you head over to Life With Katie and let me know!

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