Tuesday, June 20, 2017

Ups and Downs

Betcha thought I'd disappeared again, huh? Nope. I'm still out here. It's been a rough week or so though. It turns out that the reason I felt so awful and exhausted for 6 weeks is because I had mono. Go figure. I haven't the slightest idea where I picked it up from. All I can think of is that someone with it sneezed around me and I inhaled at the wrong time. Then, as if me having it wasn't bad enough, Roger caught it. Poor kid. His last week with it was terrible...throat so raw it was bleeding, exhausted, high fever...and one mom who was trying to be supermom. We got through it and got him off to jazz camp this past weekend, but that and the bat that moved into my house uninvited has worn me out. In fact, after I post this, I'm going to try to call my doctor's office again to reschedule my appointment and then take a nap. I'm no good to anyone when I'm super tired.

Now that I've caught you up, I  bet you could be wondering how the healthy changes are going. Of course, I also bet you know that when moms are being supermoms that they let their own things slip. I'm happy to say that it only happened a bit and as of this morning, I'm back on track with my medicine, watering my little garden, and eating breakfast. Small things, but important things. Plus, Ben and I have decided to spend 15-20 minutes each day tackling something in the house that needs to get done. I'm excited about the progress we're going to make by doing that. It's our goal to get to a point where the owner's husband can come put the rest of the ceiling tiles in. Keep your fingers crossed for us!

I guess that's that. Not a whole lot of change, but certainly some getting back on track and getting everyone healthy again. I have to reschedule my doctor's appointment to a time where I can also get Ben to work, but when I go, I'll be stepping on the scale. I don't expect a whole lot of change, but it will be good to know where I'm at. For now though, it's time to make that call and take that nap!


Friday, June 2, 2017

Fresh Starts

Holy cannoli, it's Friday again! I swear each week I say I'm going to write earlier in the week, but the days fly by and here I am at Friday again. It's been crazy around here. The end of the school year tries to kill me every year, I swear. This past week included a baseball game, a concert in a hayfield and all sorts of things that the schools and teachers are cramming in at the last second.  On top of that, this is week 3 of whatever I caught. The youngest caught it from me but he didn't get the cough and it seems to be clearing up for him. I'm better, but I still have a cough sometimes during the day and at night. I'm also just plain exhausted. Combine all of this up and this past week has been a total wash for me getting new steps in place.

I'm still doing really well with my mornings. I've taken to eating 2 oatmeal packets each morning and while they're in the microwave, I go out, grab my watering can, bring it in, fill it up, and go out and water my front porch garden. I bought some more plants last weekend but I've had zero time to get them into pots. I'm hoping against hope to somehow find some time to do that over the weekend. Maybe that can happen Sunday evening. Saturday is baseball, followed by the youngest's concert with the MSBOA District 10 All Star Jazz Band. Sunday morning/afternoon will be taken up by him doing dive training and the oldest and I working on exam prep.

Since I'm going to be all over the place and controlling what I eat, etc is going to be incredibly difficult, I've decided to give myself the weekend off and start fresh on Monday. There's no point in me adding in more things this weekend to keep track of when I'm still frantically trying to sort out everyone's schedules and if my ex-husband is going to be available to help if I need it. Stress helps no one.

So, here's where I am...I'm slowly building up a morning routine that so far is really working for me. I'm still trying to get in 3 meals a day. Come Monday, I'm going back to tracking food and working on keeping within 100 calories of what the My Fitness Pal app says I should be eating. I also think I'm going to change my weight loss goal within the app to something like 2 pounds a week instead of just 1. Time is ticking down quickly for my doctor's appointment so I'm also contemplating the conversation that I want to have with her. I want her to partner with me, not bully me.

Oh! I also got really brave and posted about my concerns in a fitness group that I'm part of. The people who commented were really encouraging and I might have one or two new fitness buddies to help me on this journey soon. I guess we'll see on that!

Until next week, this is one tired me who just wants to survive the last week of school signing out...

Saturday, May 20, 2017

Setbacks Happen...

This is me. Or it would be me if I were curled up on a much nicer couch than mine and I looked that good. Instead, I look dreadful and I'm sitting in a booth at a Denny's. So...that isn't me. The only thing I have in common with her is we both have tissues. Mine is a nice soft tissue. I hope hers is too.

Right. Can you tell that I'm sick? Not even a half page into this post and I'm already rambling. That's probably because I got all of maybe 4 hours of sleep last night and I'm thoroughly exhausted. Oh yeah, and I'm sick. I woke up with it Wednesday morning and it's still going strong.

Crazy sick. It started with a completely unproductive cough and just feeling completely wiped out. I managed to haul myself to Meijer, pick up my depo prescription and some juice, to the doctor's office to get poked, and home...and that's nearly it. I'm a horrible sickie. I just want to be cuddled and loved on and when you live alone most of the time, that's not really an option. This led to me feeling sorry for myself which never helps anyone. By Thursday, I was hacking up a lung and resorted to buying cough medicine.  I honestly don't think it's helped a lick. I was woken up well within the 4 hour dosing period by my coughing and hacking.

So here we are...Saturday...I'm completely exhausted and feel completely dreadful. I want nothing more than to be at home sleeping today away and hopefully getting better. No such luck though. I have to be mom and mom was needed to take Roger and his friend to dive training and then hang around until 5-5:30pm today to pick them back up. There's some moving them around between locations too and I'm supposed to go grocery shopping....someone kill me now or at least shoot me with a tranquilizer dart, please...

Right...focus. I can do this. What does all this boil down to? I haven't done as great this week with keeping track of things and that's okay. I've been trying to get better in between everything. Starting Monday, I'll be back at it. I also think I'm going to add in a couple of things. Up until now, I've been tracking my food but not making myself stay under my calorie limit for the day. Starting Monday, that's the first thing I'm going to add.  The other thing is a bit more personal and falls under the self-care category. I'm going to work on adding regular showers into my schedule. If I can get that on a routine, that will make self-care that much easier.

So there we go...one rambling post that I pray to god makes some amount of sense. If it doesn't, my apologies. I'm lucky to be keeping my eyes open at all at this point. I honestly think I'm going to spend the afternoon attempting to nap in the car. I'm practically drooling on myself between the congestion and the exhaustion...





Weight (via doctor's office scale) 5/17: 302.8 lbs.

Tuesday, May 9, 2017

Making Progress

....and I'm back and it's only been about six days or so! Go me!

Okay, enough of that. Let's get serious. Or not. I really don't know where this post is going to go, I just felt as if I wanted to write something, so here I am.

Last post, I talked about babysteps to getting healthier, not slimmer, but healthier. One of those steps was to get back into the habit of taking my medicine. I am one of those people that absolutely suck at remembering to take pills. If I leave them on the bathroom counter, they will never get taken. I know this. I know I'll go into the bathroom and think I need to take that before I leave...and then I'll leave and won't take it. That's just me.

What does this mean? It means that I keep 2 pill bottles on the corner of my living room stand right by where I sit. They're almost always in my line of sight (unless a cat knocks them off) which reminds me that I need to take them. This won't work for everyone, but it works for me. It's worked well enough that since the last post, I haven't missed taking either my blood pressure medication at night or my allergy med in the morning. Is it helping? Honestly, I have no idea but other than being sleepier than usual, it isn't hurting so I'm going to stick with it.

I've also started logging my food intake again. I'm not pushing myself to make changes, just be aware of what I eat. It's step 1 in the healthier eating plan. Be aware of the "values" of things. It's also helped to start getting me back into eating 3 meals a day. I have a really bad habit of either over-eating or under-eating depending on where my mood is. This helps me to regulate that which I think is really going to help.

My plan for this coming week is to just keep doing what I'm doing. It's a really good start and I'm really pleased with my progress with it. I'd love to get out and start walking again but until the pollen count drops a bit, it's safer for me indoors. I don't need to be knocked out of action for a few days due to one walk around the block. Allergies really suck.

So, that's me this week! T-minus 42 days until I go in for blood work, 49 days until my doctor's appointment. I do have to go in next week to get my depo shot done so I'll be stepping on the scale then to give me a starting number for the weight loss. I don't have a scale at home (and I do have really slanting floors) so I'll probably only be weighing in every 3 months when I go in for my shot. I'm not sure how I feel about that, but off the top of my head, I don't know of a better way to do occasional weigh ins. Something to ponder, I guess!

I hope you're all having a great week!

Wednesday, May 3, 2017

Health and Wellbeing

I don't post here nearly as much as I should and I guess that's because life happens and I stop focusing on my weight and that journey to frantically try to keep all of the other plates spinning.
That's life though, isn't it? Just when we think we have things under control, something happens and suddenly we don't.

The last time I wrote here, I had no way of knowing that a mere month later, my world would come crashing down and I would go into a state of mourning so deep that just getting out of bed each day was a challenge.
But, here we are again and I've made a decision. While the name of this blog is Welcoming Weight Loss, it doesn't have to just be about weight loss. After all, so much of what goes into getting into place where you can safely lose weight is making sure that there's a balance in other areas of your life as well.

Nobody panic. I'm not going to start writing about my kids or my day to day life here. I do think though that from time to time, there will be posts about health in its many forms. Some of you realize that I have mental health issues that I deal with. There's also just life balance. When that's out of whack, it's so easy to just let things slide and if you're me, it's me that gets put to the side.

So, where is this all coming from? Well that's an easy answer. I've been thinking lately that it's past time for me to start taking care of myself more. The weather is getting nicer (when it isn't cold and raining...gotta love Spring in Michigan!) and the house is slowly coming to order. Those things are helping clear the cobwebs from my head (some) and so I decided to go and get my prescriptions refilled. I haven't been taking anything for a while and decided that needed to change.

Except, the pharmacy said they didn't have anything on file for me. It seems I'd used up my refills a while ago and nobody had told me. So, I went online and requested more refills. Easy enough, right? Well it would have been except my doctor's office called and insisted that I set an appointment to have a physical. Ugh. Like 90% of the world, I'm horrible about going to the doctor even when I am sick. To go when I'm not sick...yeah, that almost never happens. Still, I reminded myself about taking care of me and that means sucking it up and going in. Appointment set for June 28th and yesterday, I picked up my prescriptions (one was missing so I need to follow up on that).

I don't take a lot of medication but one of the things that I am supposed to be on is a blood pressure pill. Between my stress levels and my weight, my blood pressure is high. So, phase I of getting my health back to being a priority is to start taking that pill again. I took the first one last night and that's a good first step. Now, I need to get into the habit of taking one each night before bed. I can't take them during the day because they put me to sleep. Phase II is happening a bit alongside phase I. I'm continuing to get my kitchen in order so that I can cook proper meals and not rely on what's quick and easy and usually totally processed.

This is going to be a long haul but I'm hoping that even with these small steps, I won't get totally chewed out at my doctor's appointment next month. It sucks a lot to go into the doctor's office and have your doctor tell you that they're about to give up on you because obviously you don't care about your health. That's what happened the last time I went in...I left really hurt because I'd actually started making changes and had lost about 10 pounds. This time, perhaps I'll stand up for myself if she doesn't see what she wants to see. I guess we'll see...


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